Friday, November 28th....My sister & I were saying goodbye to our dear elderly Mother as we were leaving her bedside after a fairly non-communicative visit. Susie reminded me that my Grandmother Jensen always said "never say goodbye" so we both loved Mom and told her "so long." As Susie & I were walking out of her room she unexpectedly called out clearly and distinctly, "I'll be seeing ya!" Susie & I looked at each other and called back to her "we'll be seeing ya, love ya Mom!"
Mom passed away the next Wednesday evening, December 3rd. She allowed me to be there with her when she took her final breath. She was finally at peace. I thought of all the loved ones that would be there to greet her and I felt their calming presence. I had a few moments to grieve before my daughters arrived and phone calls and arrangements needed to be made.
I realize that with her loss I am sad for me. Sad that she won't be there anymore, sad that one of my life responsibilities has been lifted from me, sad that I won't hear her say "I love you, honey" anymore in this life, sad that I don't have to pray for her anymore. But what about her? Is she sad? I don't think she's had time to be sad. She's been too busy visiting with her loved ones that she has been sad about for so many years. Am I happy? Not yet, but I'm happy for her. I'm happy that she knows that I love her, I'm happy that her family gathered and celebrated her life, I'm happy that she's with Dad, I'm happy that she lived a long and full life, I'm happy that she helped create lasting memories that I will cherish until I see her again.
So, for now....."I'll be seeing ya Mom, I love you."
3 comments:
What a sweet post mom. I will definitely miss our time each week with grandma. I can't tell you how many times this week that I have thought to ask you,"how's grandma?" And you are right, we can be sad for us but happy for her. Hang in there. Love you ;)
Mom, what an example you are to me. You are a great mother and you were a great daughter. Grandma was lucky to have you to care for her for so many years. I love you Mom!
Judy, I'm sorry to hear about your mom. But what a sweet "good-bye" you had and what a lifetime of sweet memories. It's so hard to lose your mom. You will always miss her, but she will always be a part of you. Merry Christmas to you and Rick. Love, Diana
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